A Long Memory and One Goal

If they would just listen to me!

It seems so clear, doesn’t it? If that person would just follow my advice, they would get better, stop obsessing about that lost relationship, get their projects in on time, or not wake up hungover every Sunday. If they would just listen to me!

If I could just stop myself from blurting out those words that turn them against me, follow a healthy eating plan, meditate for an hour every day, and stop being so afraid all the time, my life would finally work.

Who is really in charge? If our conscious mind and our higher level of brain development was making the decisions, our life would look a lot different from what it does now.

This reminds me a bit of how we expect children to be self-regulated in circumstances that are challenging for adults. Use your words. Calm down. Worrying about it won’t help. It’s not bad advice or wrong. The issue is that these are all cognitive brain insights and advice.

The root of healing fear, anxiety, over-eating and other addictions is that we need to heal our nervous system and unconscious mind. Haven’t we all been frustrated with ourselves when we’ve “fallen off the wagon” in some way?

Our primitive brain and survival system have a long memory and one goal — to keep our body alive. They…